i often wonder if i'm disabled in my own hometown. as long as my parents live there i'll always visit, but i can't wait for the day they move out and retire elsewhere. i can no longer go home to Neenah without looking over my shoulder, or fret about running into him. i hate my phone and i hate the Interent. but most of all, i hate Neenah, for all it's managed to not do for me in the last four years. it's all small town business. i run into someone i haven't seen in years and hear something i wish i'd never heard, let alone wish it's something i ever had anything to do with. it's a burden for my heart and it's a shame i have to invest energy in an anger i never knew i had. this weekend, i did my best to enjoy myself and i most certainly did. i credit my best friends, beer, and country music; yet, it all makes me realize how thankful i am to have a second, and now more permanent, home.... in a place where the drama doesn't concern me, and where i don't feel like i have to run from someone.

five days: Linds' 22nd.
three weeks: Mel + Minneapolis + shopping.
one month: Vegas.
one + half months: no more summer school.
two months: birthday.
two + half months: new apartment.
somewhere in between: friends + Madison + Chicago + New York.