coldplay's "talk" just came through on my playlist. hearing it was sort of jolting; i haven't really listened to any of "X&Y" for about a year. or at least my memories of the song and its sisters go back about that far. i would say that i've missed the song, but i must not have considering it took me hearing it again for me to realize that it's been months since i've heard it last. i feel warm when i hear it, though... it brings me back to a place that, if i really had to choose to revisit, i would... but i won't.

and then i remember what chuck klosterman had to say about coldplay, and i suddenly don't feel so cuddly. i sort of hate him for saying what he did about them, but i'm over it.

my lower jaw is really causing me great discomfort at the moment. for those of you who don't know, i got two of my wisdom teeth out on tuesday - the right chompers. i woke up that morning to my mom standing over me in my bed, three antibiotics gathered in the palm of one of her hands, and a glass of water in the other. "dooms day has landed," i told her while reaching for my cell to check the time. i had strict instructions about what times she could and could not wake me up at. she laughed and i told her it wasn't funny. then i realized that the glass was filled with enough water to quench an ant's request, if that. "you want to see me gag, don't you." she began with, "honey," and continued with her best shot at sounding at all Nurse Betty, "no food or liquids before the procedure..." so i swallowed all three, ignoring my gag reflex and making an effort to enjoy what i imagined to be my last time swallowing normally. i fell back asleep for an hour only to wake at 9 to apply the numbing cream to my mid-arm. there she was again, helping me even the cream out over the 2x2 inch section that the pencil-drawn instructions urged. turns out, that particular part of my arm is practically 2x2, so there i was, in yoga attire, my glasses and tennis shoes with pearly goo restricting all intentions to bend my arm. my ponytail was limp and sad-looking, so for the first time in twelve years, my mom was doing my hair. it was comforting, and the first moment of many to make me feel helpless throughout the day.

on the ride to the clinic, i tried thinking of things to take my mind off of the gruesome operation. first i tried to pretend i was someone i knew who would be brave at a time like such. Hannah. Hilary. even my littlest brother. that worked for about two highway off ramps. i tried imagining that i was about to endure an even serious procedure; something cancer related maybe, tumor-removing, plastic surgery. but when that didn't work, i found that thinking about sex helped soothe all uneasiness. however, i didn't want to be the girl that moaned outloud after being put under. even though dr. helgerson and i became close from the time that he injected me with the anesthesia to the time that i was out.

surgery didn't take long with only two teeth having to come out, but all in all, i "drunk dialed" mel post-op, called Dr. Helgerson "Doctor Helggie" and insisted to him that Garrison Keillor and I really were the best of friends.

well this was all sort of jumbly, but my jaw is beginning to take over my every thought so i'm going to go head and tuck myself in. but i wanted to drop a line for those of you who have become somewhat "religious" in reading all of this.... OH! I GOT THE JOB! writing for Twin Cities Metropolitan Magazine of Minneapolis & St. Paul of fashion, eateries and following up on hot parties.... i can't wait to start. and i'm not afraid to say that i'm proud of myself.